MANAGER.--That's all very well, Mr. Punch; but the people will grumble a
_leetle_ if you starve them.
PUNCH.--Ay, hang them, so they will; the populace have no idea of being
grateful for benefits. Talk of starvation! Pooh!--I've studied political
economy in a workhouse, and I know what it means. They've got a fine plan
in those workhouses for feeding the poor devils. They do it on the
homoeopathic system, by administering to them oatmeal porridge in
infinitessimal doses; but some of the paupers have such proud stomachs
that they object to the diet, and actually die through spite and villany.
Oh! 'tis a dreadful world for ingratitude! But never mind--Send round the
hat.
MANAGER.--What is the meaning of the sliding scale, Mr. Punch?
PUNCH.--It means--when a man has got nothing for breakfast, he may slide
his breakfast into his lunch; then, if he has got nothing for lunch, he
may slide that into his dinner; and if he labours under the same
difficulties with respect to the dinner, he may slide all three meals into
his supper.
Pages:
36
37
38
39
40
41
42
43
44
45
46
47
48
49
50
51
52
53
54
55
56
57
58
59
60