"When I was a boy, if I got a drum and a tin horn I was so happy I
couldn't keep quiet. But last Christmas little Ulie Junior cried all
day because he got a 'leven dollar automobile when he wanted a
areaplane big enough to carry the cat over the barn.
"This Christmas trust business ought to be investigated by the gov'ment
and dissolved. Talk about your tariff schedules! What we need is
somebody to pare down this Christmas gouge. It's the one kind of tax
you can't swear off.
"And as for you--why, you're goin' daffy. Other years I didn't mind so
much. You spent a lot of time and some money on your annual splurge,
but I will say, you took in better'n you gave. But now you're on the
other side the fence. These Carthage women have got you on the run.
You'll have to give 'em twice as good as they send or you're gone.
You're gone anyway. If you gave each one of 'em a gold platter full of
diamonds they'd say you'd inherited Aunt Ida's stinginess as well as
her money."
Mrs. Budlong went on twisting her fingers: "Oh, of course you're right,
Ule. But what's the use of being right when it's so hateful? All I
can think of is that Everybody in town is going to give me a present!
Everybody!"
"Can't you take your last year's presents and pass 'em along to other
folks?"
"Everybody would recognize them, and I'd be the talk of the town.
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